Kubica: I'd give anything to be back in F1

The last time I interviewed Robert Kubica, on January 31 2011, everything was different. It was the day before the first test of the new Renault R31 at Valencia and Kubica talked about his hopes that the team could build on a promising, but winless, 2010 campaign and finally give him the chance to emerge as the title contender he undoubtedly had the ability to be.

Six days later, Kubica suffered a horrific accident on the Ronde di Andora Rally. It was a crash that could have killed him, but while the 29-year-old is still very much with us, and competing at a high level in the World Rally Championship, what happened has savagely changed the course of his life.

In AUTOSPORT's January 16 issue of this year, we rated Kubica as the third-best driver never to have won the world championship. There was plenty of reader feedback questioning so lofty a position, but having had the privilege of seeing Kubica in action in F1, there's no doubt his absence from grand prix racing for the past three-and-a-half seasons has robbed us of the chance of seeing some spectacular performances.

Kubica is acutely aware of what he has lost. It would, of course, be a mistake only to look at his accident in terms of what consequences it has had on his career. After multiple surgeries and a painful rehabilitation process, he deserves enormous credit for showing the determination to make a competitive comeback in rallying.

But there is a tinge of sadness at meeting up with him again in Tuscany the day after the Monaco GP and seeing someone who demonstrated such brilliance in their pomp limited from doing what he is best at by the injuries to his right arm. Fortunately, what remains is the sheer unbridled enthusiasm and passion of someone who lives for motorsport.

AUTOSPORT: Do you now look back on Formula 1 as something in the past rather than somewhere it is possible to go back to?

Robert Kubica: F1 has been, and still is, a big part of my life; the biggest part of my life. It's not an easy time because many people think I look at F1 only backwards. I know my limits and that, for now, it is impossible for me to get back to the level I was.

Mixing it at the front during the 2010 season was a career highlight © LAT

But I could drive an F1 car. If you said, 'Robert, you will be doing a test at Barcelona in five months' I would start preparing and I'm pretty sure I would have no big problems. But there are other circuits where I would have big issues. The reality is that, for now, it's impossible for me to compete at a circuit like Monaco. F1 has a big effect on my life and unfortunately, the story ended earlier than I expected.

For me, 2010 was a very good year from a driving point of view even though, results-wise, it wasn't great. But then I stopped racing in F1 after the year that I gave the best performance of my life. Everybody remembers the last race you did, but when you judge the season you have to look at the big picture. When you know you have had a good year, you are pleased about it.

In 2010, I remember at Spa I was very upset because I lost a position in the pitlane. It started raining and we came in on slicks and had to change to intermediates. In the pitlane, you have to change the settings for the pit speed limiter when you are putting on different-radius tyres. It's quite complicated to do and I started watching the steering wheel, I had never done it before, and I started braking but the pitlane was wet and I hit two or three mechanics and lost a position to Mark Webber. But I still finished third. This was the only mistake I really made all year.

OK, I had not done a mega qualifying lap in Bahrain, I made a mistake that cost me two or three tenths, but otherwise I had put in some really good qualifying performances as well. Overall, I was finishing more-or-less where I should be or in front of where I should've been. So 2010 was a great year for me. But the start of 2011 wasn't the best. It was quite the opposite, but unfortunately that's life.

AS: You weren't just another F1 driver, but one who could win the world championship. Is that something you look back on and think, 'I could've really have done something', or is it not something you ever dwell on?

RK: It's difficult when you see Nico [Rosberg] and Lewis [Hamilton] winning. We were driving against each other since 1998, together nearly every year. There were years when I was in front of them and there were seasons when they were more competitive. But the level was very similar. Then you think you could do the same, maybe slightly better or maybe slightly worse? Who knows? But it is not for me to judge if I was able to be at the top of F1 or not.

His only F1 winner's trophy came with BMW in the 2008 Canadian GP © LAT

I know that, especially in 2008 and 2010, I had some great years. Even in 2009, it wasn't an easy year because of KERS and issues with the car, but you try to give the best you can. In the years I competed in F1, I established my position as a driver and that was a priority. It's difficult to get into F1 but to keep your seat is also not easy because the competition between the drivers is very tough. But if I was able to win a championship or not doesn't really matter now.

I was very pleased to see myself so high in your drivers' ranking. I know some people think like this, but some other people think completely differently. In many races, I finished seventh and I was happier than finishing third because I knew it was the maximum I could do with the package. That's the difficulty with judging drivers from the outside.

Many people ask me what I think about this driver and that driver and because I've been in F1, I am not able to judge because I know reality might be completely different from how it looks from outside.

AS: Has the time out of F1 changed your perspective and understanding of what was going on when you were racing? Are you mentally almost a better driver now than you were four years ago?

RK: Racing is still in my blood. I follow F1 more from a spectator point of view but watching races is not easy. This time of year is the most difficult - I discover it every year - and there are some races that I miss more and some races I miss less. There are some moments when I have stronger memories and the time between Monaco and Canada is the most difficult for me because I have the best memories from these places as I won in Canada in 2008. Monaco, because I really love street tracks and it's the really the circuit I enjoy driving.

But life is about going forward and I have to keep my mind busy. I know that if your mind is not busy enough you start thinking too much. Unfortunately, things will not change by looking backwards. I had very good years in F1 and it's something that is in my memory, my heart. I know my place in F1, which I worked for. This is most important thing although the results, of course, are also important.

AS: Are there race weekends from your whole F1 career that really stand out as ones where you achieved the maximum?

RK: One of those was finishing second at Fuji in 2008. When you get an opportunity to win, you tend to really give everything. Fuji was a really great race. The car was not competitive any more but still I managed to finish second.

AS: And with almost any driver behind you in the Renault other than Alonso, you would probably have won it...

Fuji '08 was a standout performance © LAT

RK: It wasn't easy. I qualified and there was a big problem in Turn 1 because there was a fight for the championship with [Felipe] Massa and Hamilton. There was no crash, they just missed their braking and we were able to turn tight and gain a lot of positions. So exiting Turn 1 I was first and Fernando was second. I finished behind him, and second is normally first loser, but when you review everything, it was the race weekend when I shouldn't have been there.

If I had finished seventh, it would have been a normal race but then when you finish second you realise you've done a really good job. Everything has to come together and you need to be lucky. Nick [Heidfeld] was driving the other car and he was very far away and I think overall the car wasn't competitive anymore against the McLarens, Ferraris and Renault, which had a very strong end to the season. If I had to pick up one grand prix I would say this one.

AS: The 2008 season, with BMW, when you led the championship after winning in Canada, was seen as a missed chance to go for the title. So what has happened since then shows that those sorts of opportunities don't necessarily keep on coming...

RK: In such a competitive sport, you must take opportunities as much as you can. The train might go by once and you might jump on it and see what it brings or you might stay where you are and maybe regret in a few years that it may have been better to jump on. At BMW that year there was big focus on the 2009 car and big hopes with KERS. But in the end it was a big flop.

The most difficult thing is that there were development parts in the factory that could give much better performance to the car but they were not introduced in 2008 because they were waiting for 2009. I treated this opportunity to go for the championship as if it was my last one. Of course, I was hoping it would not be, but it was.

The BMW approach, from their point of view, was the correct one. They had a target for 2008, we achieved the target and that's the reason the team spent a lot of time very early on the 2009 car.

We were the first team to run KERS but in the beginning it was quite difficult. Unfortunately, the difficulties we had with it, and the car overall, were still there during 2009. This was the reason why BMW quit F1, it was because of a lack of competitiveness. There were really high hopes about KERS and connecting F1 to road cars, but it didn't really happen. There was a political push to run KERS even though it was slower, or, at least, I was slower in a KERS car because at the beginning of the year I was overweight. So it was a difficult year.

AS: Despite your interest in F1, we haven't seen you turn up at a Grand Prix since your last race in Abu Dhabi in 2010. Why is that?

Kubica likes to stay out of the spotlight, so he doesn't visit races anymore © LAT

RK: Last year, I was competing in a German rally so I tested on the Friday the week before. There was a DTM race at Nurburgring. I had a plan to go and see the race. I called Toto [Wolff, Mercedes motorsport boss] to ask if I could come and he said, 'no problem'. On Sunday morning I left Trier and I started feeling, 'I should go'...'I should not go'.

Every time I had driven before when I tested GT cars on circuits, I enjoyed it. But in the evening after driving it was painful. Memories were coming back and it was not a nice time. I didn't want this, I wanted to keep my mind busy, try to feel well and have fun. Driving on a circuit was fun, but gave me a strange feeling in my stomach.

So I went to Nurburgring, but half-an hour before, when I started driving around the area and memories came back, I texted Toto and asked to meet at his hotel. But his hotel was next to the circuit and when I got there Auto GP was on track. When I heard the sound [of cars on track] I met Toto in the hotel for breakfast and then I went back to Trier. I suddenly got a feeling that I didn't like.

Last winter, I nearly went to Barcelona to see an F1 test day because I was curious to see how it had changed. But I would prefer to stay at home and see it on the screen. At home, I have no journalists asking me the same questions and no photographers!

I miss F1. I would give everything to be able to be back in an F1 car. But to watch the race in hospitality is not so attractive for me. It would also give me the feeling of missing something.

AS: When you look at F1, do you see something you know you should still be part of?

RK: Yeah. It doesn't make me feel guilty, but many people tell me, 'you were doing this [rallying when you should have been focused on F1] when you crashed'. They don't realise that I am the first one saying this! If someone had told me how it would end up, I would never have done rallies.

I was keen to do rallies because they gave me something extra. The top F1 drivers are more or less on the same level, so I was searching for something that would give me an edge. For example, during a test if it starts raining and the circuit is half damp, half dry you will not drive. But on the race weekends, if it happens you have to drive. So rallying made me a better driver. Maybe not a quicker driver but a more complete driver. Of course, it ended up badly, but that's life.

AS: So the desire to do the rallying was part of the mentality that made you so good in F1 and you can't have one without the other?

Kubica believes mentality plays a big part in what he achieves as a driver © LAT

RK: Normally I don't read about F1. But I know Felipe [Massa] said that I should not be rallying now and he's right. But this is Felipe's mentality. Thanks to my mentality, I made it to F1. I didn't come from a country that had an F1 history and did not have big sponsors behind me. I was lucky to have good people who helped but my career would have stopped when I was 13 or 17 without the mentality and character that helped me to F1.

When I started racing at international level in karting at 13, driving was everything. In 2001 I was living in the workshop and I didn't go to school or anything. I spent all day in the factory and workshop with the mechanics. For me, enjoying life was driving.

AS: But you have had a taste of F1 since your accident. You have done work for Mercedes in the simulator. How did that come about?

RK: It was part of my recovery and started as one opportunity. It was good for my body and good for my mind as well. And people were happy with what I was doing to help them. So I did a few sessions there, sometimes between the end of free practice and qualifying on race weekends.

AS: And this was proper work, actually contributing to what the team was doing?

RK: When you are a race driver, the simulator is more a tool for getting used to operations but it is important for the engineers to have someone who is keen to do it because they have a lot of work to do. In order to make it in line with reality, you need to spend a lot of time and a lot of energy and be really passionate about the simulator. I was going there for full days. I drove overnight on the Canadian GP weekend. I started Friday evening and ended Saturday morning.

I was keen to do it but unfortunately later in the year rallying became more stressful. In order to do well there, I didn't like doing too many things, so I let it go.

The difficulty with the simulator is that you don't have such good feedback from the chassis and from the car. In reality, you feel everything with your back and ass but because everything is virtual your concentration tends to be lower, especially when you stay in for a long time because you aren't risking anything. You need to be consistent and drive in the same way in order to give good feedback and improve.

Before Canada last year, we did 900 kilometres but this year I haven't done anything. In the end I let it go, which is a shame, but it was the right decision because I have to focus on one thing.

AS: Why did you turn down an offer to race in the DTM with Mercedes and pursue rallying last year?

Deciding against a Mercedes DTM drive in favour of WRC was a tough decision

RK: Going back to circuits after the accident was the most simple way and the best way from an economic point of view. And it was the best way of using my experience but somehow it felt too easy. I was not happy because I feel like I stopped F1 and I had still something to prove to myself and to achieve. So I tried to set my new target. Rallying was the more natural way.

It's not saying that I don't think DTM is a good championship, it's one of the best in motorsport because it's very competitive. I was very surprised how the car felt, and the feeling it gives to the driver, which is closer to a single-seater than a GT car. In the DTM, there is a lot of aero, quite good downforce so it's really nice to drive but because of my goal and because of the period I was in I thought rallying would keep my mind busier and would help me to recover.

I put myself in a completely different category, a completely different sport. Not a lot of people realise how different it is. I knew it would be hard and I knew it would be a difficult step. Last year, it was rallying or DTM and it took me quite long to decide.

But I thought, 'I am not very young, but I am still not very old and I am still hungry to achieve something'. So I set some targets for rallying and only time will tell if I can achieve them or not. I also wanted not to have this feeling of missing F1. When I am doing rallies, it keeps my mind really busy, so it's good.

AS: How is rallying going?

RK: When you are doing circuit racing, from a very young age you learn circuit racing characteristics. When you start to be a rally driver from a young age, OK not so young as karting, you have to learn typical characteristics for rallying. The difficulty is that in circuits you have one approach, in rallying another approach.

Sometimes, things that on circuits are very important don't matter in rallying. It's a bit like a basketball and volleyball player. Take one of the best basketball players, put them in a volleyball match using their hands and a ball, so it seems the same. But it's not the same. It's similar with sprinters and marathons, you are still running but when you are doing training for marathons, it's completely different than doing 100 metres.

Many times, my circuit habits do not help me. Actually, they are disturbing me and the way I drive is not paying off. You leave too small a margin. And the biggest difference is that on circuits you know exactly what will happen, nearly everything you have under control. In rallying you have nearly nothing under control, especially when you are approaching the rallies for the first time.

AS: So what's the plan now - finish the season, keep re-programming yourself? Do you know what happens next year?

Kubica sat down with AUTOSPORT's Edd Straw in Italy © LAT

RK: I don't know and it's too early to say. But I see things in a very simple way. I had a target in F1 and unfortunately I was not able to achieve it for different reasons. The main reason is because of the accident. So I set a new target.

While I believe that there is a possibility to achieve, then I will try to achieve it. The day I see I cannot do it or because it's too complicated, then maybe I step back. But stepping back is like losing for me.

By choosing rallying, I knew I was taking a very twisty, difficult road. The way can be very harsh but when you have big challenges if you achieve them you have big satisfaction and I think after a difficult period and what happened to me, I need a big challenge.

It's more like personal goal and a personal challenge than something else. More than a year ago, I put the plusses and minuses of circuits or rallying and if I just looked at the paper I would say only a madman would go rallying! But because in the end I'm a person, not a machine, I need to be happy with what I'm doing and I need to try to achieve what I think will give me satisfaction. This is the reason I am doing rallying.

DON'T WRITE HIM OFF

Kubica's rallying odyssey continues at Rally Sardinia this weekend. While his five WRC outings so far this year have yielded little - four retirements, too many crashes and then a conservative sixth last time out in Argentina - don't bet against the Pole cracking it in rallying. His pace has stood out, and if he can temper the instincts honed from two decades of circuit racing, he could develop as a serious contender at the top level.

But no matter what he achieves in rallying, it's clear that he should be in F1. The way he talks about driving a grand prix car at the start of the interview - that 'for now' - it's impossible to return, reveals that he hasn't completely given up on a return. To make a comeback would surely involve further painful operations and rehabilitation work with no guarantee of success, but the fact that such an option might even be open to him tells you a lot about the determination of Kubica.

Whatever happens, his record of just one grand prix win does not do justice to his ability. In his pomp, Kubica was great. It's a tragedy that the world has not had the chance to see him cross swords with the great drivers he was the equal of for the last four seasons.