Paul Versus the Volcano

Allow me, if I may, to borrow a line from Melbourne's daily broadsheet newspaper, The Age, which last Saturday managed to focus perfectly on the main event at the Australian Grand Prix and raise a few wry smiles.

"It's not all screaming Formula One machines at Albert Park," wrote Alan Attwood. "There's a range of support events: go-karts, Formula Three cars, cars with celebrity drivers and V8 utes... But the most entertaining event is not even on the official programme: Paul Stoddart versus the Rest of the World."

And so, he was. Rarely can a major sports event - and there is no doubt that this four-day carnival is a major global sports event, given the crowds (118,200 on Sunday afternoon), the television audience and the sheer scale of media interest - have been so easily hijacked by a side-issue; but a side-issue of unknown significance, laced as it was with accusations of chicanery, self-aggrandisement, opportunism, political manipulation and all kinds of other machiavellian motives.